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Standing on the Precipice

What a difference a year makes! Last year at this time I had just returned home from an amazing educational series in Sedona, Arizona, started my lease on an office space, and was seeing my first 'friends and family' clients to work out the kinks in flow and paperwork. Years of dreaming and months of planning and preparation had me finally standing at the brink of a dream realized, opening my own private physical therapy practice specializing in myofascial release. This morning, I stand on an entirely different precipice.

What a difference a month makes! Last month at this time I had just returned home from another amazing education series in Sedona, so excited to get back to work and incorporate my new skills. I was on my way toward my goal of completing advanced level training in myofascial release this year. But just a couple of days ago my next class was cancelled, derailing the course I was on.

What a difference a week makes! As someone who rarely watches the news, and doesn't believe everything I hear on social media, I was still in denial that this Coronavirus "thing" was going to be something that would impact me directly. This week I am feeling shocked and fearful, along with everyone in the country (even those who still want to downplay it, joke about it, or get angry about how it is being handled...we all cope with our fear differently!) We can no longer deny that the threat and course of the Coronavirus is going to have life-changing impact on all of us.

What a difference a day makes! Yesterday my scales were still tipped toward remaining open for business for any clients that still want to come. Today, I wake after a restless night, standing on that precipice of decision, leaning toward temporarily closing down my practice (how tight to close the door, and for how long, I do not yet know!) The tipping point for me was the Facebook post from a friend. On the same day that his teenage daughter with leukemia finished her aggressive chemo, completely knocking out her immune system in preparation for a bone marrow transplant, one of her caregivers was diagnosed with the Coronavirus. In the medical community, every precaution is taken around immune compromised patients, but now they just have to wait and pray that it was enough.

The decisions and sacrifices we have to make right now are not easy! I so desperately want to help people, but I even more desperately do not want to harm them! I feel healthy, I feel strong, I don't feel personally fearful of surviving the virus if I were to get it, but I am terrified of being the one who unwittingly spreads it to someone else who may not. Before this is over, some of us may have done just that. The experts are not saying that the spread can be stopped, just that it can be minimized or slowed by our actions. So all each of us can do is make careful decisions day by day, weighing the benefits versus the risks for ourselves and others.

For now my business doors will stay open a crack. Decisions to go through with visits will have to be carefully and individually weighed. Any slight symptoms of illness on either side will not be ignored, and all reasonable precautionary measures will be followed. Things may change. By mandate or daily decision-making, doors may be fully closed in the next few days or weeks. I trust that Boundless is in business for the long haul, but the timetable for being back to business as usual is as unknown as the future course of this virus.

What a difference today makes! As I stand here on this precipice, I feel my fear, but I still trust in a beautiful future. We all stand in the shadow of this unknown, yet I look out and see the strength of human character shining through. I see kindnesses being offered, sacrifices being made, and people stepping up in the face of challenge. I pray that the loss of life will be minimized, but this is a good time to remember that none of us is guaranteed a tomorrow. We plan for the next few weeks, worry about the next few months, and hope to get back on track during this next year, but we only get to live in today! Today we can show love to those around us. Today we can call someone who is feeling alone. Today we can find things to be grateful for. The landscape of our future is built on a series of todays. So let us be intentional about making the most of each day that we have been given!

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